sometimes I dream very intensely.

This dream has changed in the last years … the more intensively I immersed myself in the world of bondage, the more it developed … and today I keep dreaming in this direction.

I am lying on a cot in a dark damp musty smelling room dressed in a penitent shirt like you see in movies and I don’t know how I got there or what is going to happen to me …. I’m scared … I don’t know how long I have been lying here or what has happened at all. It is dark … somewhere a light flickers, but it does not reach me … and it is silent around me.

Uncertainly I sit up … look around cautiously … I can’t see much … it is too dark … under my bare feet I feel naked stone floor … cold and a bit damp … I start to shiver and wrap my arms around my upper body, tighten my legs and listen into the darkness.

After a while I hear footsteps … coming closer … the flickering light reveals a silhouette, but no face … Metal meets metal and the grate opens with a squeak … a deep voice orders me to stand up and turn around … without thinking I obey … trembling with cold and fear but also with a feeling of excitement, of tension … what is coming for me? The footsteps are approaching me … Hands reach for my hair and tie it into a braid, which lies on my back … something soft and cool covers my eyes … twice it is wrapped around my head and closed at the back of my head with a jerk … now I see nothing more … must rely on my other senses … a smell of aftershave rises in my nose, I hear breath, feel fingers in my neck, tracing my neck contours … the man now turns me a little … I feel him on my left side … his breath approaches my neck … and then suddenly a firm grip on the back of my neck, a second hand on my throat, pushing my head back a little … the voice, this time whispering: don’t be afraid, nothing will happen to you that you don’t wish for … and then warm soft lips that gently lay on mine … a tempting tip of the tongue caressing my lips.

The hands let go, wandering down my body … I don’t dare to move …
Once again I am turned a bit … now standing with my face to him … smell his scent, feel his breath … he must be much taller than me, because he has to bend his head quite a bit … my hands are tied together in front of my belly with a rough rope, but not too tight … it doesn’t hurt … and then again a firm grip on my neck … the other hand gently caresses my face to rest my head on his chest … suddenly I feel safe … the fear falls away from me … Curiosity awakens, what he might be up to with me …
Forever I could stand like this … secure in his arms … I have no idea who he is and yet he gives me a strong feeling of security … a feeling of security and trust in this short moment.

He turns me … now I feel him in my back … his hands are on my shoulders “now run” he whispers to me and directs me in the desired direction … unsteadily I put one foot in front of the other … it is a strange feeling to be so blind … automatically I count the steps silently … It is not very far … arrived at 120 we stop …
He must have had the end of the rope in his hand the whole time, because now he pulls my arms upwards a bit … Chains rattle and then I stand there with slightly spread legs for a safe stand … something cold metallic I feel now on the left shoulder and already the fabric falls … the same on the right and then still between the breasts … cool air brushes over my now exposed body … and suddenly the fear is there again … assaults me with power … a sound of terror echoes from the walls … Rope is wrapped around my upper body … over the chest and underneath and strictly pulled together in the back … again a chain rattles and I feel how I am pulled upwards … must now stand on tiptoe to have ground under my feet … not a word has he spoken to me … always only touches, light stroking … it doesn’t really calm me down … a little push and I swing free in the air … desperately fighting for a secure footing only to lose the ground again … my thoughts swirl wildly … Fear, fascination and also excitement alternate … overlap …
And suddenly everything is silent … it seems like an eternity, despair spreads … but in the meantime my mouth has been closed with an adhesive tape … I can’t even scream anymore …
So busy with myself I notice the movements around me only very late … only when hands touch me … many hands … and everywhere … only slowly I can concentrate again on what is happening … they are not unpleasant touches … stroking, sometimes a little slap, a pinch here and there …

… and suddenly I emerge from my dream world and am awake … I would like to know what happens next